Press On

About...goodness, 9 or 10 years ago now, I went through a bit of a rough spiritual season.  It wasn't something that happened overnight, but just a gradual distance that I allowed to develop between the Father and I.  I started walking on a path that was not the one I knew in my heart, (but chose to ignore) that He had for me,  making some choices that were not stupendous, I had stopped going to church or reading the word, didn't pray much.....pretty much parked my faith on the back burner.    Looking back now, I can see the Lord's hand all over that season, in His protection, covering, and guidance, even in my choices.   But at the time, though I knew in my heart He was with me, I did not live in that truth.   Around the time I had reached a point that was probably the lowest for me, there were a few circumstances that began to turn the spiritual tide of my heart.    After a short period of time I found myself back in church, involved in a young adults study, digging into the word with an intensity and passion I had never had before and pouring myself out in worship every day for hours at a time.   I fell in love with the Lord in a new way.   A way I had never really known His love in my life....much I imagine, like the prodigal son coming home.   The group of friends who I had grown close to throughout this season (many of whom I am still good friends with now), were all coming out of similar seasons.   We joined together as kindred spirits, all seeking to know this king who had redeemed us.   Desperate for His presence, and  thankful for what He brought us out of.   It was a time of spiritual growth like I have never experienced before.   Still to this day, I look back at that time with such joy and gratitude.  
    A few days ago I was thinking about that season.  About how much I missed those Bible studies, sitting in a living room with a few dozen friends, praying and worshipping, discussing books or passages of scripture.    Encouraging one another and experiencing what I can only describe as an Acts like fellowship.
Since that time we have scattered.   Most of us married, many with kids.   A few of us moved on to work in different ministries, some left to go to another church, some have moved away, a few of us stayed behind where it all began.    But regardless it was a season that has shaped me even to this day.    And at times I think "If I could only go back" or "I wish things were like they were then"
But the Lord reminded me recently,  that while the memories are precious and the season fruitful, it was just that....a season.    And to dwell in the past, no matter how amazing it was, will not help but rather harm me in the present.   Not because we should forget, or because we should not be reminded of His faithfulness to us.   But because if we are looking back at the past, we aren't looking forward toward Him.   That season served its purpose....a great one, and I don't think I would have been adequately prepared for all He has called me to over the last decade had it not been for that sweet time in my life.   I am thankful, but we are called to press on toward the goal to win the prize, not get stuck on mile marker 23.   And maybe that verse is in scripture, partly to act as a reminder for us to keep moving forward regardless of what season we just came out of, or are moving into.    Not to get stuck in a moment in time, good or bad, that has shaped us for better or worse.  But rather to press on, take that next step, move forward trusting...knowing that the Lord will use every moment for His glory.   That He will redeem every tear, and polish every scratch, He will mend the broken heart, or use the victory for the good of the kingdom....but we have to be willing to take the next step.  We have to be willing to move on and let the Lord do the rest.